She Got You Here, But She’s Not Coming With You

There’s a version of you that built everything you have now.
She's been resourceful. 

She kept you afloat.
She got you seen.
She helped you survive.

But she’s not the one who’s going to take you to your next level.

In this episode of The Awakening Series, I’m exposing the hidden ways we shrink, settle, and self-protect...even inside a business that looks like it’s working.

This isn’t about abandoning her.
It’s about thanking her…
and then becoming the woman your future actually needs.

The fire is rising.

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Make sure to connect with me on IG: @fiercemomboss

Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome & Challenging Your Comfort
• 1:56 The Lie of the Safe Life
• 4:20 Success as a Hiding Place
• 6:53 Fear of Your Own Power
• 8:47 Release Safety, Embrace Your Calling

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

Welcome back to the she's On Fire podcast, the business empowerment podcast for women ready to step out, follow their heart and make an impact in this world. I'm your host, jen Gaines, and we talk all things marketing and mindset to truly crack your soul open and light your world on fire. Truly crack your soul open and light your world on fire. So today, first of all, if you haven't listened to the previous episode right before this, go listen to that first, because these episodes are running together. They go hand in hand. So if you did listen to it and episode one cracked something open for you, this one might burn a little, because today we're talking about the thing that's actually keeping you stuck. It's not fear, though that's part of it. It's not failure or potentially failing. It's not your business strategy. It's the lie of the safe life, and today we are burning that down.

Speaker 1: 1:11

I've been an entrepreneur since 2008. I didn't have a backup plan. This was the plan but I still found myself choosing safety. Found myself choosing safety not in a job, but in how I played the game and how visible I allowed myself to be and how much I let myself want. I stayed in comfort cocoons no one could see. I don't talk in terms of comfort zones. If you've been around for a while, you know this. In terms of comfort zones, if you've been around for a while, you know this. I talk in terms of comfort cocoons because really that's what it feels like when you're playing it safe, when you're afraid to step out, you're in a cocoon where it's cozy, it's comfy and it's safe.

Speaker 1: 2:00

I built businesses behind the scenes. I was visible, but only to a point. I was bold, but never too bold. I followed what worked, even when it didn't feel like me anymore. And the truth is I was managing my fire Carefully, strategically, as if the more of me showed, the more there was to lose. That was my safety net, that was my protection. It wasn't a nine to five, it was the nervous system version of don't get too loud. And eventually that version of safe started to feel like a cage, not because anyone put me there, because I kept shrinking to fit it. So let me break this down for you. Your business can still feel like your comfort cocoon. Success can become a hiding place. Just because you're building doesn't mean you're rising. There's a version of you that's safe, strategic, predictable, controlled, and I know this because I've lived there.

Speaker 1: 3:24

Even after years in business, even after seeing results, even after seeing client results, I told myself I don't need to make more money. I don't need to make a lot of money. I started this to support my family. I just wanted enough money to stay at home with my baby. And yes, all of that was true. That was the mission in the beginning. But somewhere along the way it also became a comfort cocoon, a story I could keep telling myself.

Speaker 1: 4:01

So I didn't have to want more, so I didn't have to stretch. So I didn't have to want more, so I didn't have to stretch. So I didn't have to fully own my power, because wanting more would have meant owning that the only thing in my way was me. It felt safer to say I'm good with where I'm at than to face. The truth of what's possible for me is as big as I'm willing to claim. I'm going to say that again is as big as I'm willing to claim. I'm going to say that again. The truth is what's possible for me is as big as I'm willing to claim. That goes for everybody. And listen, there are women out there doing 10 times what I've done, not because they're more talented, not because they're more deserving. But because they stopped managing their power, they went full in with their power and that realization, in a way, wrecked me, but it also freed me at the same time, because I finally saw it. I wasn't afraid of failure, I was afraid of what would happen if it actually all worked out and I know that sounds crazy, but I see this so often, and even for me, when I first realized that I'm like I'm not afraid of success, I want success. Who doesn't want success? Whenever somebody is afraid of success, and I tell them that they always fight me on it and I know how they feel because I was there.

Speaker 1: 5:58

Here's what I believe. I truly, 100% believe this God spirit didn't put this fire in you so you could keep it at a manageable temperature. You weren't asked to make yourself smaller or safer or more palatable. You were asked to rise, to lead to burn, and the version of you that's been managing her light, she's not coming with you. So I want to ask you this, I want you to think about it when have you been managing your fire? Where are you still playing it safe?

Speaker 1: 6:42

Now you may be back in the beginning, that's okay, but I want you to think about this because I want it to not happen to you, not happen to you. So where are the areas that you're playing it safe, even though no one is asking you to? Where have you outgrown your own story? But you're still clinging to it like it's the truth. You didn't come this far just to plateau. You didn't come here to build all of this, just to survive. You built it because you were called. That's why it's on your heart. That's why I see so many women who quit for various reasons, being afraid, not getting to where they want to be quick enough, which I won't even talk about the long game right now. But the reason why I see so many women quit or slow down and then come back is because they've been called. And most likely, if you're here, it's because you were called. And now the calling is getting louder.

Speaker 1: 8:03

I want you to say this with me, write it down. I'll go slow first and I'm going to say it a second time I am done choosing safety over soul. I release the story that good enough is enough. I open myself to the full magnitude of my calling. No filter, no guilt, no apology. I'm going to say it again I am done choosing safety over soul. I release the story that good enough is enough. I open myself to the full magnitude of my calling. No filter, no guilt, no apology.

Speaker 1: 9:07

Because here's the thing the moment you stop playing tug of war with your fire and you step into it is the moment everything starts to move. This is your awakening, this can be your awakening right now. It can be your release. Awakening right now. It can be your release and this can be your rise. The version of you that only asked for enough to get by. She got you here. Honor her, thank her, honor her, thank her. But it's time to let her rest, because the version that's coming next, she is uncontainable, she's wealthy, she's anointed and she's already inside you waiting. So let's freaking go.